Recently I went to my bf's grandma 95th birthday. The celebration was simple and between close relatives only. So I felt very elated when I was invited because they knew me for a long time already but I still got butterflies in my stomach while I was there. I don't know why I still have the jitters when me and my boyfriend have been together for more than 2 years now.
It's amazing to see her grandma still very active and agile. She shows a radiance around her that night and you will see that she's very happy despite of being alone(she's been a widow for a long time) and of her old age. She's very accommodating even for someone very foreign as me, I am the odd-man out in the party. As I was there observing her I couldn't help but think of the inevitable; getting old.
How is it like to be an old-gay man? Am I going to age gracefully like my bf's grandma? Or will I suffer debilitating diseases like AD (Alzheimer's Disease) or other kind of diseases that may lead to a bedridden state? They're just a few questions that actually plagued my mind that time. All of it have scared me a lot. Getting old is everyone's business, while aging gracefully is an art.
I guess all the answers will be how I live my life now at the present and how I plan what will happen in the future. The truth is I said to myself when I was still a kid that I might only live until the age of 70 or at the least. Now I still have at least 4 more decades to prove my existence in this world, live my life as it should be and leave a wonderful something in its place. That's how it's going to be.
I guess all the answers will be how I live my life now at the present and how I plan what will happen in the future. The truth is I said to myself when I was still a kid that I might only live until the age of 70 or at the least. Now I still have at least 4 more decades to prove my existence in this world, live my life as it should be and leave a wonderful something in its place. That's how it's going to be.
3 comments:
Life is what we make it, I always say. We get thrown into situations beyond our control but it is how we deal with the situations that makes everyone different.
Aging is one of those situations we cannot avoid. It is our attitude towards it that will determine what we will become.
Thanks for that wonderful insight Quentin.
Love never dies. I absolutely loved that video.....very touching and quite beautiful.....it got me to thinking....you'll never be as happy as you were as a child..constantly craving that inner bliss...You'll only be that happy when you find that true love. The one you love so much it hurts. The one who you can't stop talking to your friends about... the one who makes you laugh so hard pop comes out of your nose on your first date... and it's okay. The one that loves you for your mistakes and all. The one that will catch you when you fall...regardless of who it is. A boy, or girl, or someone out of this world... for me god is love and love is god. If I remain true to my inner child I shall never be alone.
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