Sonic on his way

It's been three long hard weeks of waiting finally the day when I'll pick up Sonic, my pet chihuahua, had arrived. I know he suffered so much because he wasn't with me although he is properly taken care of by my mom and my "padrasto." I made it a point to call him everynight and over the phone I can hear him sing and talk unintelligibly. I did this because I fear he might not recognize me anymore.

And everytime he does that i just go weak in the knees. How could such a little creature could be so much intelligent and loveable yet hated by some people? So little time but he was able to capture their hearts just like the first time I laid my eyes on him and hug him. 

He is the perfect pet for me.

Have you been robbed before?

It was in the morning after I finished my graveyard shift when I discovered that the place where I lived was ransacked. Everything were thrown everywhere. Yes, my place was been robbed, unluckily. Hu! hu! hu!

This is what I get living alone in a foreign land. Maybe the neighborhood is not that safe but what can I do? While on the other side of the city, they rob you too with the skyrocketing rent fees for their apartments. Hell yeah, what's the bloody difference?

You know what the funny thing is I've been living in this apartment for almost 3 years now when they finally decided to add more security. They've put an iron gate exactly in front of my apartment door. I overdid it and got more paranoid and said to myself maybe these was not enough and decided to add a padlock. It takes time for me to open the whole shit but for the reason I wanted my things to be safe I never minded. It never entered my fucking mind they could get on the balcony door. Who could have known that here in DR the robbers are more like spider men and do acrobatic stunts? My place is on the third floor, do the physics. Well, I learned my lesson the hard and costly way. Never to trust the impossible.

With the help of some friends we reported the incident to a seemingly disinterested and incompetent policeman on duty that time. The way he responded made me think otherwise, our report was useless. The only most logical thing to do now is to wander what I have lost and how I can buy a replacement in the next following months. Don't get me all wrong here I am not a materialistic person but one of the things they stole that night is a basic need to thrive here;

POWER INVERTER

It's true you can't live without it in this electric-power forsaken country because of the massive and multiple blackouts they have almost everyday or every night. We're actually making the stockholders for PI manufacturing companies get richer and richer every second of this BS 'apagones'.

Memorable dreams

I'd like to share you some of my unforgettable dreams I had them when I was growing up and also of the most recent ones. All of them baffles me up to this day, and I am still clueless what's their meaning.

According to Wikipedia dreams consists of images, thoughts and feelings experienced while asleep. Their contents and/or purpose are poorly understood, but until now have been a topic of speculation and interest since the very beginning.

(1) Flying contagious superhero

I dreamt of being a caped crusader with the ability to fly and when I touch bystanders they're immediately transformed into my clone and followed me flying all over the city. According to a website I found, flying is an expression of our desire to break free of restrictions and limitations. A desire to be free and above all difficulties and the desire to dominate and be above others. It makes sense because during that time in my life I was not that out to my family yet.

(2) My own wake

It's eerie to dream about a wake when the one inside the coffin is you. The dream starts with me walking in a throng of mourners wearing the black mourning clothes and as I pass by them they turn to me as if they can see me but with no expression at all. Actually the faces of the people were unknown to me but later on in my life I got to know them one by one and remembered that I saw them in this dream. If the meaning of this dream is an end to one thing and a beginning of another it is safe to assume it is also related to my coming out.

(3) Going to work naked

I also had this freakish dream most recently where I went to work (imagine this!!!) on the buff. It started without a shirt first, then the next day my pants were off and finally with only my hand covering my thingie. Although I didn't minded even though my neighbors were looking at me only in my birthday suit. The dream analysis said that this is an expression of my unwillingness to let people see the "real" me and that unconsciously encouraging me to become more open with my feelings and more accessible emotionally. To which I say it's next to impossible since here in DR they're a little bigoted in these sort of stuffs and I'm not about to jeopardize my position if I come out to them.

100th Post

I am proud that I have reached 100th post albeit the time constraints I have experienced lately. So it is rightful to extend my gratitude to those bloggers and visitors who may have added me in their list or graced my humble blog more than once.

The number 100 has a conjunctive meaning of individuality and aggressive initiation of effort toward a goal and understanding by experience and the use of reasoning. All of which have been and until now the backbone of all the authored posts. The goal is very simple as it is to serve as a storehouse of information for the community. To share my experience so that others may understand what they're going through. And lastly, to solicit reasoning from the readers as to expound what could have caused these situations in their lives.

The number also signifies a single step on the road of our acceptance. A small step. But what is important here is that we have braved that step and will never falter with the succeeding ones even though we still have a long way to go.



Photo courtesy of Mallorca Photo Blog

Forgetful me

This video reminded me of something I was before, a BITCH without a cause;

It's true that sometimes we go ballistic over something that we ourselves is at fault. I remember about getting mad at the people I live with because I can't find my book. It was the exam week and I have not even open a single page of that book . I am a chronic crammer. I was shouting at everybody and was so pissed off I nearly broke up with my ex. With the fury I had that time, I was throwing things and all. Shame! shame! shame! It turned out I lent it to my classmate.

Still young @ 95

Recently I went to my bf's grandma 95th birthday. The celebration was simple and between close relatives only. So I felt very elated when I was invited because they knew me for a long time already but I still got butterflies in my stomach while I was there. I don't know why I still have the jitters when me and my boyfriend have been together for more than 2 years now.

It's amazing to see her grandma still very active and agile. She shows a radiance around her that night and you will see that she's very happy despite of being alone(she's been a widow for a long time) and of her old age. She's very accommodating even for someone very foreign as me, I am the odd-man out in the party. As I was there observing her I couldn't help but think of the inevitable; getting old.

How is it like to be an old-gay man? Am I going to age gracefully like my bf's grandma? Or will I suffer debilitating diseases like AD (Alzheimer's Disease) or other kind of diseases that may lead to a bedridden state? They're just a few questions that actually plagued my mind that time. All of it have scared me a lot. Getting old is everyone's business, while aging gracefully is an art.

love never dies
Uploaded by director

I guess all the answers will be how I live my life now at the present and how I plan what will happen in the future. The truth is I said to myself when I was still a kid that I might only live until the age of 70 or at the least. Now I still have at least 4 more decades to prove my existence in this world, live my life as it should be and leave a wonderful something in its place. That's how it's going to be.

DR on my lens - Motels ala Las Vegas

If the Philippines have their Pasay and Old Manila as their sin city, Manfresa and San Isidro are DR's version. It is where you can find lots of 'cabanas' or motels situated on both sides of the avenue. The place has so many lights that it can be mistaken as Las Vegas, I wonder how they can maintain them even with the 'apagones' (blackouts) every now and then. I have been in almost all of them and they boast of a lot of amenities. One particular amenity that fancied me is that they have automated and glass door shower area that's so costly in the Philippines it could only be in the executive suite, (I have been to our own motels too and I know what I am saying is true.) but here they're just from a normal suite.

In most of them you will have to have a car to go inside because they're a drive thru' type of motel. Nobody sees you while you go inside the garage. One more move that's perfect for PLU doing the down low which is mostly the case here in DR.

From Square One, Closing

....... a child.

It took some time for the abuses to stop. It wasn't me who have brought up the matter to other elders. It was another cousin that he was also doing the same abuses. However he was just apprehended but was never incarcerated. "Bantay Bata (Child Watch)" is not yet known during that time. They chose to shut up for what matters most was the sake and name of the clan. Our family hold the municipality the same as the Marcoses did during his regime. The case would mean disrespect from the community. So no word came up. It angered me so much deep inside. I am just a nobody.

Again fate stepped in as my family failed to have a decent life in the province even if we're near our relatives. Life got harder for us so my Dad decided to pawn our house to my grandfather. He accepted it. I can't believe it, he should be helping us instead of putting us knee deep in the mud. My dad was devastated but at least we have some money to start on. When we get back to Manila we started our life again. We tried fitting in a single rented room in the city. Everything was there, the living room, the kitchen, the bedroom. We had a communal bathroom where everyone in that same house were using. The house had other tenants and all of them were family just like us. We were in squalor. The hardships in our life had me more occupied than my budding homosexuality. Everything was thrown at the back.

It didn't take long when our funds have depleted, and we were forced to look for another place to live. Wonder of wonders, there's another relative have rescued us. We ended up living in the southern part of Metro Manila. Life over there wasn't any better. We didn't pay rent but we took care of the property. And when I said took care, it means doing the herculean task of making the place habitable. When we arrived the place was a wreck, a small-hill with big ipil-ipil trees can be found in the backyard a throng of mosquitoes guarded it. Me and my dad flattened the mount of soil with our own bare hands under the scorching sun. We planted crops there so we can get by. Having less than enough, we crawled out of poverty. Time flew and little did we know that we were already young adults.

During the elementary school years I was already showing hints of queerness. I always played with girls. More involved in cultural activities and never did bother to learn any type of sports. My classmates started teasing me but I paid no attention them. I was happy being what I am. Life went on until one day when I was in the 6th grade I met this guy. He's way older than me. He was a street vendor selling cigarettes. I was resting midway from my walk to my house and sitting under a roofed lot. He approached me and started to ask me some questions. He seemed to be a nice guy. We talked about a lot of things. He was amazed that I know more than my age. He was amazed about me knowing more about SEX. He dared me to put it in practice with him. We lured me into fucking him in a vacant storage house that's where he taught me how to fuck his ass. I didn't like it at all but I remembered getting the hardest boner I ever had. I never came but the event solidified my attraction to guys. After that we never saw each other again. I continued walking the same route hoping that we would cross paths again. We never did but then I met a handsome priest who was very fond of me. He gave me toys and asked me to pass by the church everyday. And so I did. He was abnormally sweet to me. He liked giving me a body rub. I didn't see anything sexual in it so I allowed him. However, before something might have happened to us he was transferred. I missed him, his touches and his encouragements. I knew then that I was different.

It was the sophomore year when I came out. Disappointing half of my female classmates who had a crush on me. I am not a looker but I was always topping the class. The year before that I had my first and last girlfriend. We never broke up. I just realized it wasn't her that I was falling for it was my male best-friend. He left before he ever knew that I was attracted to him. While the poor girl never knew the reason why I dumped her.

High school life was indeed the happiest time of my life. I've got lots of friends, including the ones that have introduced me more into sex. I've got lots of boyfriends too during that time.

They've helped me hone my talents in giving pleasure to the same sex. Me and my gay pals counted partners more than we could. Year 1986, Rock Hudson was diagnosed with the gay disease. Sex was just sex, as we were so ignorant then.

Even with so much disgusto, we spent one summer vacation back in our province. Memories came back reeling as I had to face my uncle who had molested me. He did change a bit he became somewhat ashamed and avoided me while I was there. Maybe because I was out and proud already and he saw the effect of what he had done to me. Although I never blamed him. And even though we have grown up, my dearest cousin was still the apple of the eyes my relatives. Nothing have changed, I was the bad apple. I am still a nobody. He never have shown any signs that he remembered whatever had happened between us. His non-chalant irked me heavily that I turned my attention to a younger male cousin.He was the one who had asked help from his parents when we were being molested by my uncle. He had grown a bit of a young man thus a prey to my eyes. I had an evil plan to seduce my younger cousin to doing it with me. One time, I went over his house and since we live nearby I had no trouble asking him if we can play together. Same trick, we tussled and hustled then when I got the chance I grabbed his crotch. He was aroused obviously as his shorts were already wet with precum. He haven't ejaculated before so when he saw the wet spot, he was intrigued by it:

"Hey what happened? Did I just pissed on myself?"
"You don't know what that is?"
"Nope!"
"It's your love juice.......It comes out whenever you get excited. Are you excited?"
"Yes I am!"
"You want me to continue?"
"Please do!"

And so I did. Armed with all the skills I learned from my past experiences I gave him the blowjob of his life, which he really liked and enjoyed. I let him come inside my mouth. He asked me to do it once again the day after that. And then the day after that. Until he was so much into it, that I started feeling guilty. One time after we did it he had a seizure. He was epileptic. I felt more guilty than ever before in my life. Not only I am a gay and he was my cousin but I had repeated the vicious cycle. The prey now became the predator. I realized that it had to stop. But he wanted to continue doing it as soon as he recovered after a few days from his seizure;

"Let's do it again, please!"
"No I don't think we should"
"Why not?"
"It's not right."
"But I want you to."
"I said no and never. It's just a one time thing"
"Please!!!"

He was so persistent that he grabbed and kissed me. I kicked him on the face and got him shocked and so was I. Confused like hell, I left him sobbing. I did not mind what happened to him at all. I scurried back to Manila all by myself. That was the last time I saw him. My guilt is still within me until.......

"Hi cousin!"
"Hey!"
"What's up?"
"Am fine, it's good you were able to chat me."
"Yeah I got your addie from -------"
"Oh yeah!"
"So how's your life there in D.R.?"
"Oh just work and stuff"
"Hey have you heard about -------(1st male cousin)? He left his mom and lived with his girlfriend now!"
"Really?I didn't know."

My female cousin news got me excited. Although I have decided long ago not to be bothered about anything that is related to my relatives, I inquisitively asked;

"What about Uncle -------?
"Oh him, he's still a bachelor."
"Hmmmmm!"
"He's living alone in the province."

I could not elaborate no more as I might give her an idea.

"Hey, one time I would like you to chat with my pop, mom and -------"
"Sure why not?"

We had chatted a lot of other things whenever she saw me online she buzzes me. One time she buzzed me and told me she's with someone who wants to see me on cam. I opened my webcam and saw him (the 2nd male cousin) and was flabbergasted. He was an adult now. We said our casual 'hi's and 'hello's' until I asked them if he's already married. They said he wasn't fit to be engaged because of his condition. I sulked and felt remorse. Their answer was not enough to take the guilt from me. It have bitten me once again. The years that have passed failed to erase it. Albeit the predator in me preys no more.

From Square One, Mid-half

.......he never came but that was the beginning of our many sneaky exploration whenever we find opportunity.

My father came from his long stay abroad working in Mediterranean region. That's the first time I got to know and see him in flesh. He was never really there as I was growing up. He had a lot of money with him and was able to secure us a house in the province. Fate have decided what's going to happen with the secret rendezvous between me and my cousin. Our sexual exploration put in halt not giving him a chance to return to me the favor. When our house was built we left theirs and settled in the province. My father chose to be near to our relatives with the hope of them taking good care of us. He was very confident that with them around our life will be so much better. So he thinks. Little does he know my nightmarish childhood have just begun.

The apparent favoritism in the family made me a rogue child. I have done every bad trick in the book, I became a kleptomaniac, I became a chronic liar. Hence the black sheep of the clan. I even didn't know what's happening with me then. I just knew something was missing in my life. And because of my secretive nature, one time I stumbled upon a stack of magazines of the stepbrother of my grandmother. The magazine was full of naked male pictures and sex stories and upon seeing them a flame reignited in me. I got hooked. Whenever there was a chance I sneak up inside his room and browse over the magazines. They were magnificent in my eyes, the perfect abs, the contours of the muscles, the different shape of the dicks. And even the subliminal messages like power, submission, passion and ecstasy that those pictures convey were obvious to my very young mind. And because I was aware of all of these I could have exuded a come-on appearance, like the effect of pheromones to the bees, thus attracting adults to me. The sneaking up continued until one time I was caught en flagrante delicto by an uncle;

"What the fuck are you doing there?"

I was dumbfounded and don't know how to respond. Although I was not doing any sexual act during that time, I have no way of scurrying out of that situation. The magazine was on my hand and I was sweating profusely. I was looking a pre-coital position of two men.

"Aha! What is this?"
"Oh I just found that under the bed Uncle"
"And who said you're allowed to see this kind of things?"
"Nobody!"
"Did you tell that you saw this to anyone?"
"No Uncle"

When I said no, his eyes lit up a bit. He grinned devilishly. I didn't know if it was my appearance or that he knew already that stuff was under there that gave me away he continued his 3rd degree questioning until,

"Did you like what you see?"
"Uhmmmmm I don't know"
"You're sweating a lot, I know you like it"

I bit my lip and decided I was caught red-handed there's no way I can lie no more.

"Yes, I like what I see"
"Do you like this (pointing the thing between his thighs)?"

Am scared I did not know what to do. He opened his tight pants and extracted his member from his smelly underwear. His cock was crooked to the left, monstrous in size and did not look delectable as portrayed in the pictures of the magazine. I gulped and waited for what's going to happen next. I knew I was about to plunge in a pile of deep shit.

He was already hard and drooling with wet and sticky precum. He went near my face and hit me with it. I didn't like the smell at all. I guess what my other relative said that he was nuts is true. That he was a bit of a person from the loony bin. Maybe that explains his lack of hygiene. Well if he's nuts, definitely his nuts won't be smelling good at the least. I tried not to open my mouth but he pinched my jaw until I was forced to open it. I cried but he told me not to or else he's going to hit me with my grandpa's cane. I know that cane was hard and it would hurt me badly. Quickly I stopped my sobbing and did what he asked me to do. He face fucked me when I finally opened my jaw he was humping like crazy until he reached his climax. Minded not that my teeth was scraping his cock badly.

And when he was about to come, he shoved it entirely that I thought I was going to choke to death. He let go everything that went inside my gut. He did not stopped until I did not get the rest of his cum. All my eyes were red and I had a snotty nose from that intrusion. Afterwards he slapped me with it until finally its dried he treated me like I am a towel. He did not bother to ask me if I was okay. If I liked what he have done to me. All I remember is that my body was shaking and I knew my childhood was gone forever. He said we will be doing it again, I almost puked. I did not want to, but who am I to say no I am just his nephew. I am just .......

From Square One, Intro

It was said that in order to discover one true-self you need to go back from the very beginning. Much of what we are now are just reverberations or repercussions of what had happened to us in the past particularly in our precious childhood. With this in mind I want to share one of the reasons how I became GAY. I said 'one of the reasons' because I still believe it's a combination of sort. I was incestuously involved with some same-sex relative starting at a very young age of five and this went on until I had it not only with one but three of them.

I was clueless back then that what we're doing is taboo or mores in the society. Neither do I have the idea of what a child molestation is. Youngsters are naturally sexual active as they tend to be exploratory in this period of life and also because of this innocence they are usually violated. I know many of you may have experienced the same and had been emotionally ravaged by it. Some of us just kept mum or have intentionally erases the said experiences in their memories. Good thing now most of the societies with the help of media have acted on protecting the children from the perversion of adults, blood related or not.

Having a nomadic family back then I was accustomed to transferring from place to place to live. And sometimes we have no particular or apparent reason at all but on this occasion we moved out because the place where we lived was burnt down by a big fire. And being a toddler as I was, I have no knowledge of what have transpired, but this story is not about that. All I know is that we sought refuge from a relative on my father's side and ended up living in a roof of a well-to-do relative who had an only child. His mom was my second mom by church rite.

Me and my male cousin were almost of the same age. Obviously we played together a lot. He had so many toys then which made me more envious of him because I never had one. Then he also went to an exclusive school and even got to be fetched by a school bus. While the poor me just walked to and from my public school everyday. His mom loved and pampered him so much. He was the center of attraction even to our other relatives. And I was a nobody compared to him, so a hidden desire towards him grew in my heart. Unknown to me that I was already nurturing that feeling towards the same sex.

One particular afternoon we were inside his room playing with his GI Joe's and Transformer action figures. When we eventually got tired we decided to wrestle. We hustled and tussled on top of his bed as we go on tickling each other in a juxtaposed position. I accidentally brushed my hand on his nether region. Got nervous how he would react but instead it seemed like he felt nothing about it. Once again I touched him intentionally that's when I felt the hardness under his PJ's. We were all wet with our sweat maybe because of the activity or because it was high noon then. I saw his face blushed whenever I did that and apparently he liked what I am doing too.

"Oh keep doing that!" he exclaimed while I run my hand up and down on his small member.

"You like it???"

"Yeah it feels so nice, keep rubbing it."

That's when I decided to make a bold move of outlining the shape of his crotch. I am not sure what I have felt but it was kind of exciting as his thing grew bigger and warmer on the palm of my hand. He pulled up his shirt and showed me his navel which then I started playing with my cute little fingers. He was so ticklish and laughing hard that I was afraid somebody might hear us. Good heavens it was siesta time so our folks were either sleeping or heavily watching daytime drama on the boobtube. I continued tickling him while we rolled and rolled over on top of his soft but small bed. I smelt his sweaty skin which is kind of sweet since we were still young then and I liked it so much that made me lick some of drops of sweat on his belly up to his two brown knobs on his chest.

His giggles turned into almost inaudible sighs. I continued smelling him while I reached over to cup his and decided to untie the PJ's he is wearing to see how big it was when hard. I was curious if it would look and smell the same as mine. When I pulled his white drawer the emanating aroma was so inviting and sweet that's why I dove in and smelt some more. He held my head in place so when he forcefully shoved me I was utterly helpless but I enjoyed it that I let out my tongue and lapped his mushy and pinkish member. His face grimaced with gusto and he whispered;

"Please put it inside you mouth!"

The warm feeling and inviting smell of his member made me obey him and I automatically swallowed it up to the hilt like what I am doing to a juicy banana. We never had proper training but maybe because of human instinct I bobbed my head while he continued humping me until we were both satisfied and exhausted. Of course .......

What's cooking? The New Menudo - that is!

I remember I was a teeny bopper then when I got infatuated with Madonna in her playboy magazine and with the then-famous boyband of my days; Menudo. But much to my surprise I am more aroused when I see the naiveness and the freshness of Ricky Martin. He became one of the subjects of my many cream dream that plague me almost every night. And in my true fashion, I became obsessed with him that I started doing choreography of almost all of their dance songs, one in particular "Like an Explosion". I even started imitating them wearing those striped socks that lands just below the knee in its length which they have sported in the 80's or what we called "the menudo look".

Little did I know that I am already showing my true colors to which it didn't escaped the attention of my classmates who begun teasing me. It didn't bother me at all since I am still in my teenage and happy go-lucky kind of life, and don't mind the sexual connotation of being labeled as "bakla (queer)". Now that I am in my adult life I was amazed to have stumbled upon the plan of reviving Menudo, which tickled all the memory and I started reminiscing.

Now, so much about my so-called life let's begin with Menudo's then and now. The group's originator was Edgardo Diaz of Puerto Rico, he tried a lot of combination of five boys and every member who reaches the age of 16 has to leave the group in the hopes of giving the group immortality.The group's name was coined when her sister, upon seeing the boys rehearsals under their driveway exclaimed, "Que mucho menudo hay aqui!", menudo which thus in this phrase means young men was stuck and eventually became the group's name. Over the years the group were continuously evolving with every change of member and has continued doing tours mall to mall or in every available TV show that they can perform. When he had grouped Charlie, Ray, Roy, Robbie and the most popular of them all; Ricky Martin (my crush)



that was the time he gained international attention as far as Philippines and Japan. Sadly when all the members have outgrown the age that they should be, and all of the said members were already out, the new ones have failed to compare in its popularity or fame, little by little they faded in the music scene. Eventually the name was sold to a Venezuelan investors.

Fast forward to 2007, just when the Reality TV sprouted like mushrooms after a storm, a show was made for reviving the group entitled "Making Menudo" and it was aired on MTV primetime. According to Menudo Entertainment the formula used for the old Menudo will be the same but this time with a twist, the age of staying in the group which was 16 was lengthened to 20. Giving more opportunities for the members to strut their stuff. The new Menudo's first single will be "More Than Words" on the same album name and sung by Jose (15), Chris(15), Emmanuel (16), Monti(18) and Carlos(18).



Their sound will have an urban/pop/rock feel in both English and Spanish versions.

Bring them on and let's see if one of them can steal my heart just like Ricky did.

Worrisome distance

I've never thought that it would be very hard to bear the emotional impact of being distant to your loved ones. Although I may have brainwashed myself into thinking that I shouldn't be perturbed by any of these, it is inevitably likened to the waves of the seas crushing the stones of its shores. No I' m not that strong and willful as I would like you think, the truth is I am like a marshmallow inside. Waiting to melt and reduced to nothingness.

Lately, I got some bad news that my longtime boyfriend got hurt in a brawl after a drinking spree. I didn't know what to do, I cried and became worried so much I had a sleepless night. It is an awful feeling you wouldn't dare to have.

I almost thought of swimming the vast ocean just to be with him. To comfort him and take care of him.

Prayers can move mountains, that's what they say and which I came to believe. With a throng of internet friends I have I was able to gain not just one prayer from me but from all of them. They prayed for him and it worked! He just suffered a minor contusion and only a stitch is needed to be done.

Thanks for all of you guys who were with me in time of crisis, my heart goes for all of you!

DR on my lens - Lush green Botanical Garden

It's truly a herculean task keeping nature amidst the escalating pollution problem the world is now experiencing. But with the ambitious goal and a willing treasury of a government nothing can be impossible. Such is the amazing feat of Dominican Republic in maintaining the largest botanical garden



in the Caribbean. With approximately 2 million square meters of land, it is located within the heart of the capital; Santo Domingo.

And since it occupies a large amount of land you will need to ride a small train



to be able to go around and view the park. You can find exhibits of the indigenous flora and areas dedicated to palm trees and orchids. Some other exotic plants too from all over the world can be seen in the park. Also on the grounds is what was once the largest floral clock in the world.

A lot of you who may have visited Japan will agree that their Japanese Garden



is one of the most lovely in the world. I took a picture that befits a postcard image in its beauty and serenity.

And so they say, "if there's a will, there is a way!"

My love of.......DOLPHINS

It's been awhile now since I have been wanting to be associated with dolphins that I have chosen it as my animal representation. A lot of its character is what I was and is really emulating. Now I am beginning to think that I am obsessed by it. Just imagine I have dolphin posters, dolphin paper weights, dolphin bracelets. Even my laptop wallpaper and screensaver consists of (guess what?) dolphins. Here comes a new gadgetry that I wouldn't mind spending my moolah, well the only problem is I dunno if they have it here in DR.

Colors of my blog

It was said that colors of our likings define our personality, and so is a blog wherein the prominent colors found here in speaks of my personality or goals of this blog.

When I was creating my template I opted for the color BLACK to be the overall background to signify my protest against sexual discrimination particularly that which LGBT community experiences. And that I will not relinquish anything or give up our fight. Titles of section are lettered in VIOLET which is a color preferred mostly by us but for me it is simply my desire to be understood by many. Blog post titles are colored BLUE because I long for our unification and your sensitivity to the topics whichever I discuss particularly concerning our whole being. RED texts defines my passion for life, leadership in my chosen field, and the power to steer my very existence in this world.

And last but not the least is the color GRAY for most of the texts which embodies that eventhough how much ambitious as I am I should still remain humble. Keep my feet on the ground. These are the colors of my blog, what are yours?

Have you ever.......?

Have you ever sneak up somebody before? I mean sexually, like putting your hands and grabbing a guys wang under the sheets or his drawers while his sleeping or drunk. Yeah it's really exhilarating at first, the thought of him hitting you when he wakes up or that he'll tell everybody what you were about to do with him. It's so scary but also very rewarding when the guy allow your advances. I've gotten my fare share of the same kind of experience and it turns out well just like in this movie:



It's a matter of making up a dialogue that'll he'll give in to your desires once he wakes up. Like for example; "Gusto kita at kailangan ko ito, sana wag mo akong bibiguin!" (I like you and I need this, I hope you won't fail me) those were my exact phrases when the guy woke up and I stopped sucking him to stare him in the eyes with a puppy look. I guess he could not say no for an answer, I am already gripping his thing on my hand. HEHEHEHEHH!

Show subtle signs that you like him so much before you got the chance to do this, look him directly in the eyes and then on his lips every once in awhile, then go stare at his bulge if there's an opportunity. Praise him about his looks and his body, and act on his indulgences. But of course, he has to know what you are already for this to be effective.

Et voila! He can be your boyfriend instantly that of course if he enjoyed what you've done to him. Now all you have to do is perfect your skills while waiting for that pouncing moment and everything will be A-OK.

Lost in SPAIN

It's been almost 3 months now that I'm blogging and I haven't posted anything yet explaining on how in the world did I get here in DR. First of all, my mom was already married to a Dominican guy making her a legit citizen of this country located in the Caribbean seas. Then she thought of bringing me here to try my luck and get a job. Actually the post would not be about me securing a job here but about one of my memorable experience of traveling by plane.


It was nearly 3 years ago when I first boarded a plane and, as you may say, I had the bad case of jitters and the butterflies just keep on messing with the contents of my stomach even before I got to NAIA. I was overexcited I had sleepiness nights. Never had I shown this to my other siblings because I don't want them to think I'm chickening out. Hell!!!I'm going to travel alone and it'll be my very first so how should I feel. My travel route was Manila to Thailand, Thailand to Rome, Rome to Spain, then finally Spain to Dominican Republic. Oh yeah that was fucking 18 hours of flight. Good thing am a very patient traveler and a persistent gourmet eater.....heheheh Ive' eaten almost everything they've offered me in the plane. Am so bloated that I even had to do it there on the plane. Poor stewardess she had to put air-freshener. Yuccckkkk!!!

On the first two trips the travel was very uneventful. I've gotten my surprise when I was traversing Rome because it was so cold and freezing, I think that was the time when Pope John Paul II had died. I didn't have any coat with me just my Penshoppe long-sleeved shirt which surely had failed to make me warm. No wonder people were looking at me besides I was about to freeze to death, but I am the only one Asian left on that trip and that I am so puny compared to them. Imagine I am only as tall up to where their chest are, I was walking with a throng of giants. I was praying they would not step on me, heheheheh just kidding.

So finally we landed in Spain and boy how I was at awe when I looked around. Their airport is attached to a big Mall with boutiques that you don't see in ours and it has lots of walkalators going to different areas. The place is so big and these walkalators were like spaghettis finding your way is a big problem. In every airport there's a certain SOP that they're were applying and in Spain you have to give your passport as soon as you get out of the plane door. I have no working knowledge about Spanish so I did not understand what the customs police have told me. Upon handing them my passport I immediately followed the crowd getting off. I ended up inside the Mall, I am a window-shopper freak and since I still have enough time I've decided to stroll around for awhile. But when it's about an hour less to my supposed ETD I got so worried already because they haven't handed me my boarding pass yet. And I don't know where exactly I am going to get it. I panicked so much that I was going to and from just like in the slapsticks comedy and while there are signs that I can read, it was no help at all, still I'm 404. With the little Spanish that I knew I've pulled all my nerve to approach the information desk and explained my case in broken spanish and using my 2 handy dandy travel dictionary. Would you believe they were looking for me already? Heheheh! I'm like a fugitive that the whole Spanish customs administration were already going nuts and yet I was just strolling around cluelessly. I guess they've had heard about Filipinos going TNT, and I was not spared being branded like them. So in my broken Spanish I tried to explain to them what had happened alas they did not understand me well (So my 2 years Spanish subject too did not help). Good heavens they've finally found someone who can understand and speak English and the problem was solved. After some questioning the guy who turned out to be a supervisor accompanied and brought me to the place where I should have gone in the first place. They made me wait outside where one of the guards,



being as inquisitive as they are have asked from what country have I come from. He's so cute like an angel with a towering nose that I can't help but look at. I'm a sucker for Caucasians. When he learned that I came from the Philippines, after I told him that I was not a Korean nor a Taiwanese, he tried to say "Magandang Araw sa iyo" to which I was very surprised. I asked him how come he knows how to say that and he said he had a Filipina nurse girlfriend before and she taught him some. All of my hopes have gone to the drain when I heard that....well what do you know I can't help it. We've talked some more and finally when the customs head called me and gave me back my passport I got saddened. I had the feeling that Miguel and I might have connected other than just being friends but I needed to go and there's no way I can stay there any longer(you wish!!!). You could say I had a mixed feeling when I boarded the plane, a feeling of relief, a feeling of enjoyment and disappointment but to sum it all up, it was a memorable experience I had in a foreign land, to be lost in SPAIN. What about you have you ever been lost?

Salamat po! (Thank you!)

It's an honor to be enlisted on your blogroll, the roster that you have is definitely an A-list. I hope I can live up with the expectations but in the meanwhile I'd like to thank you with all my heart. It's the truth that when I stumbled upon Pinoy Gay Blogs

I have gained back the interest to write, I was a contributor back then to the defunct beefcake magazine Valentino in the Philippines using the same pseudonym. I thought my muse have left me forever and that I'm done being a writer. Guess I'm wrong because I finally found all of you who are now my inspiration. Thank you so much!

To the group, I wish all the best and more power. Mga kababayan, let's paint the whole wide world web in Pink and in time surely we'll be free. World Peace!!!

A glimpse of Dominican hotties

I thought of sharing you photos I got of some Dominicans taken from a parade they have here every February. Latino's look very different with each other some are white, some are brown skinned and some other that are almost black. If they can't differentiate a Filipino from other Asians (they only know Chinese), am also having a hard time in classifying them. Nonetheless it's still nice to look at them. It's true being in Dominican Republic is like being in a country full of UCB models.Whenever there's an opportunity I'll take some more pictures to share it with you. This time I'll try to make it a point to give you a closer look at them.

Sayonara Evviva Male

It's always saddening when you are just starting a friendship and you lose them right away. And you have no control of whatsoever to make them stay. In reality this melancholia is always present in life, whenever we are leaving school or work or a lover a feeling that's like a part of you have just been taken away, which we can do nothing but accept.

There's only the consolation that they're doing better or happy where they are now. Just like what I felt when Greg of Evviva left the Blogosphere.

Sayonara my friend! You and you're wonderful blog will be forever missed.